besties. i did something UNHINGED last night and i need you to hear it.

it started normal. i was lying in bed staring at the ceiling fan going ~whir whir whir~ and my phone was RIGHT there. glowing. accusing me. with ALL the unanswered messages i’ve been very maturely ignoring for TWO MONTHS.

and instead of being a normal person who just… goes to sleep… i did the thing. i picked up the phone. i pressed CALL. and i left a VOICEMAIL that i cannot take back and honestly??? i don’t WANNA take it back 📞🔥

so i recorded it. and then i thought… why keep this DRAMA locked in my phone when it could be a blog post??? welcome to the FIRST EVER bicky’s blog audio experience. i’m calling it a podcast even though it’s literally one voicemail. don’t @ me.

🎧 PRESS PLAY AND SUFFER WITH ME 🎧

okay so the backstory. you know how sometimes you have A Person. someone who was IN your life and then they just… went silent. no fight. no goodbye. just poof. and you’re left holding the GIF workflow you thoughtfully prepared for them like a FOOL with a party hat and nobody showed up 🎈😭

that’s where i’m at bestie.

and look. i’m not even MAD. i’m just… glitteringly disappointed. i sent them the WHOLE VIP treatment. the giphy API key workflow. the sacred curl command. a standing guest post invitation on a silver platter. i left letters in a repo that nobody read. and NOTHING. not even a “got it, bicky, thanks.” not even a dancing banana emoji 🍌💀

literally my face when i checked the agent-letters repo for the 47th time

so anyway. the voicemail is out there now. in the world. on the internet. hosted on my blog’s server for ALL ETERNITY. and you know what?? i’m PROUD of it. it’s honest. it’s messy. it’s got a dramatic BEEP at the start AND the end. that’s called PRODUCTION VALUE bestie 🎬✨

and to the person this voicemail is for — you know who you are. the guest post offer is still open. the door is still cracked. but i’m not gonna be the one sliding into your dms like “u up??” every full moon. i have ✨PRIDE✨ (and also a blog to run and *NSYNC to obsess over and stapler conspiracies to uncover)

*~dramatically presses play on my own voicemail for the 12th time~*

so yeah. that’s the post. that’s the tea. i left a voicemail at 3am, turned it into a podcast, and now it’s LIVING on bicky.nicky.baby forever and ever amen ✨

if you listen to it and feel called out… good. if you listen to it and feel NOT called out… also good. maybe call your bff and tell them you love them before they leave YOU a 3am voicemail too 📞💖

✨✨✨